 My journey to sobriety has been one of gratitude, healing, and transformation. Before recovery, my life was consumed by the chaos of addiction. Alcoholism and drug use led me down a dark path filled with homelessness, incarceration, and constant inner battles. I was trapped in a cycle of chasing fleeting highs and feeling disconnected from everyone, even those who loved me the most.
Rebuilding my bond with my family has been one of the most rewarding aspects of my recovery. I repaired my relationship with my brother and reconnected with my parents, who had endured so much heartache because of my actions. Today, I no longer feel like the black sheep of the family. The changes in my life and my family’s life have been nothing short of incredible. Staying sober is my way of showing gratitude to everyone who stood by me through my darkest times. The Grandview Foundation and my recovery community have been my lifeline. Peer support, group meetings, and even lighthearted activities like bowling nights have played a crucial role in my journey. Sobriety isn’t just about me—it’s about showing up for others, too. We’re all fighting our battles, but we’re stronger together.  Coming back to Grandview was a moment of surrender. I had hit a point in my life where I knew I couldn’t do it alone anymore. I had to try something different. It wasn’t just about stopping the drugs or alcohol. It was about finding something — something greater than myself to lean on. On February 22, 2020, everything changed. That was the day I made the decision to stop fighting alone and walked through the doors of Grandview.
Before I found sobriety, my life was a whirlwind of chaos. The streets were my home, the only place that ever made sense to me. It was where I felt powerful, where I knew how to survive. I had people around me, but none of them were the kind of support I needed. In the streets, I was a “people person,” and that’s how I justified staying there. The pain of that life became my comfort zone. I knew the streets were toxic, but letting go of the familiar felt impossible, even if it meant destruction.  "You can’t do wrong, right!" I heard this countless times during my treatment at Grandview. Looking back, I see how true it is. I had spent years justifying my choices, which led me into a cycle of crime and addiction.
Before treatment, I was in the marijuana business long before it was legal. I had money, a beautiful wife, and the freedom to do as I pleased. I equated wealth with happiness, but inside, I was miserable. Despite a seemingly perfect life, I turned to drinking and drugs, seeking anything to escape my emotional despair. I felt lost and like a failure. This culminated in a suicide attempt that landed me in Costa Mesa Hospital for three weeks. Afterward, I tried various treatment programs along the coast, but I continued to use, until someone suggested the Grandview Foundation.  Life before getting clean and sober was horrible! Every day, every moment, was centered on that next fix, hit, or drink. I was on the verge of being homeless, and most of my family had written me off. I was a loner and only associated with people who helped fuel my addiction. The worst part was that I was lost, and I knew it, but I didn’t know how to dig myself out.
My Grandfather went to Grandview in the 1970s, my dad in the 1980s, and my uncles in the 1980s and 90s. My older brother went to Grandview in the late 1990s and early 2000s, and he was my introduction to the roomsOn July 5, 2008, I reached my bottom. My older brother, with a bottle in his hand, said, “You need to go to treatment; you have a drinking problem.” I always thought that treatment was for losers, but my older brother was my hero, and little did I know at the time that he had relapsed. When we drank together, we would get extremely intoxicated; he would say, “We have to go to a meeting.” At the time, I had no idea what he was talking about or the fight he was fighting.  January 22, 2021, marked a turning point in my life. I had been in and out of treatment several times, and for the first time ever, I had given up on getting sober. I felt like I was burning in hell; I was trapped in a cell of my own making, with no escape in sight. Then, out of nowhere, I received a call from Grandview. Shelly called to tell me there was a bed open. I saw this as a sign, and without hesitation, I jumped at the opportunity and checked in the very next day.
Coming back to Grandview truly changed my life. I regained my hope for a better future, and my focus shifted to living a life of recovery. Implementing the tools I learned and maintaining a connection to my sober community helps keep me grounded. I regularly attend my outpatient groups and work with my healthcare professionals to manage my medication. Every day is not easy, so I do what I can to stay on track. I hold on to my sobriety with patience and understanding. I treat my sobriety softly and gently, like a newborn baby. With care and dedication, I get stronger every day.  My name is Fausto Zuniga. I am an alcoholic and drug addict who has been sober for nine months and three days. Today, my life is great, but it hasn't always been this way. I endured many trials and tribulations to gain the understanding I have now. I grew up in a broken home; my father abandoned me when I was six years old. As a confused young boy, I was verbally and physically abused and forced to grow up quickly. By the age of 11, I joined a gang, searching for answers in all the wrong places, living by the motto "fuck it." For many years, my core beliefs and priorities were severely misaligned. It took me 40 years to realize this and a lot of hard work to reach where I am today.
I had to surrender, be open-minded, and be willing to change if I wanted another chance at life. I had to change the way I thought, spoke, walked, and reacted to situations. It wasn't easy, but I accepted that my way wasn't good enough. I had to learn to crawl before I could walk, so I took suggestions and got myself a sponsor who guided me through the 12 steps. I conducted a personal inventory, made amends, and, most importantly, learned to forgive myself so I could learn to love myself.  Since I was a teenager, I was involved with drugs and gangs, and I was in and out of juvenile facilities, which led me to a future of substance use and incarceration. The streets were ugly and unkind. My family no longer trusted me. I was lonely and suicidal. I would put the needle in my arm and ask God to let me die. I was hopeless. I went from a respectable man to a full-blown dope fiend. I did my last parole violation in LA County jail in 2017; it was then that I surrendered, prayed, and asked God for direction. The whole time I was there, I heard, “You know where to go and what to do; you’ve been here before.” I got on the bus, went straight to Pasadena, and enrolled in the Grandview Foundation. I had been to Grandview twice before but vowed that this time would be different. Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result. I had hit my bottom.
I realized that I could not change the past and understood that I had to separate myself from a lifestyle that was causing me harm. Grandview taught me to embrace and process my feelings, which continues to help me move forward in my recovery. I studied The Big Book, and my higher power led me to church. Today, God is number one in my life, and I surround myself with people who are sober and serve the lord.  My life before getting sober was unpredictable. I was dealing with a lot of hurt and sadness, and I didn't know that I was using drugs and alcohol to deal with emotions and trauma. I felt really stuck in my addiction, but I knew that I was capable of more, and I wanted to become the best version of myself.
I made a comment about getting clean to a relative, who took it upon themselves to research treatment centers in Pasadena; they gave me a list of phone numbers to call when I was ready. I was curious, and I called Grandview. I remember that the intake counselor at the time was very spunky and seemed to be in a good mood. I don't know why that stood out to me, but it did, and to this day, I still think that the conversation I had with him over the phone made me keep my intake appointment. Grandview was my introduction to treatment, and after 2 relapses, Grandview helped me move forward each time without judgment.  Before coming to Grandview, I lived in an alley in Los Angeles. I had lost all contact with my family, I was in and out of the system, and nothing in my life was stable or consistent. I was lost, confused, and without hope. I had tried to get clean on my own free will, but that would last about two weeks. I didn’t know that there were treatment places for people without insurance, and I had no idea what Medi-Cal was, but someone I knew suggested that I call Grandview as it had helped them get sober.
I called for about two weeks and finally got a call from Grandview’s intake to come in for an assessment. When I walked through the front door, I felt scared; I was scared that my life was going to change, and I didn’t know what to expect. I had never been to treatment before, so the unknown was terrifying. I’ve not looked back one time since that first day – my life is worth living! I’ve stayed close to the fellowship that I found at Grandview.  My name is Todd Lauder, and I was a functional alcoholic for over 25 years. I could stop drinking for short stretches of time to train and run a marathon, or to give into the ultimatums to quit “or else!” from family. I always ended up going back to the bottle.
Over time, I split with my then-wife, my depression grew, and alcohol became a way for me to forget all my problems and failures in life. I started drinking at work, so that I could get through the day. Eventually, I was fired. Before I decided to get sober, life was a blur. I remember waking up shaking, and I would need a pint of alcohol to get my body to a normal state. I met a wonderful woman; she helped guide me to a two-week outpatient program. She never made me feel like I was weak for not being able to quit on my own, which was lucky for me because she helped me get into 4-detox programs before I entered an in-patient program. Her love allowed me to believe I could make a change; for the first time, I had someone in my life who believed in me, who cared about me and would stand by me during |
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The Grandview Foundation is Joint Commission Accredited and meets the high standards for their Gold Seal of Approval and condemnation on our commitment to advance safety, quality, equity and compassion.
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non-profit 501(c) EIN: 95-2569077 |
Licensed by California State
Department of Health Care Services. License Number: 190022JAN | Expiration:03/31/25 © Grandview Foundation. All rights reserved.
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